Tag Archive | truth

What Is True?

Sep30

© Wendy Clark 2025

People who speak in the public square are being persecuted for their belief in absolute truth. Those who persecute them have their own definitions of both “God” and “Jesus,” and push back against the truth. This is why they can dress, speak, and behave in disgusting and foul ways and still say that they are “a good person,” or that they love God or say that they are Christians or that they follow Jesus and then accuse people like Ben Shapiro and Charlie Kirk and those who stand up against abortion or transgendered ideologies or sexual sins or those who say that Jesus is the only way to be saved, of being ungodly or not Christ-like or of being evil.

It used to be that you could talk about God all day long and most people would smile and nod but to talk about Jesus was a dividing line that sent the other person walking angrily in the opposite direction, but now, in most cases, you can talk about both God and Jesus–just as long as you don’t get too specific about what might be required to truly follow. 

People are happy to “live and let live” as long as they can hold onto their general and squishy ideas about God, Jesus, and what is right and good. It is your “moral certainty” that they find “hateful” and “dangerous” because they rightly assess that the truth is the enemy to all they hold dear.

Isaiah 5:20-21, NLT
“What sorrow for those who say
    that evil is good and good is evil,
that dark is light and light is dark,
    that bitter is sweet and sweet is bitter.
What sorrow for those who are wise in their own eyes
    and think themselves so clever.”

John 3:19-21, NLT
“And the judgment is based on this fact: God’s light came into the world, but people loved the darkness more than the light, for their actions were evil. All who do evil hate the light and refuse to go near it for fear their sins will be exposed. But those who do what is right come to the light so others can see that they are doing what God wants.” –Jesus

Philippians 4:8-9, ESV
“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.”–Paul, Apostle of Jesus

What We Believe Matters

Jun18

© Wendy Anne Clark, 2025

I was recently reading a Christian book where the authors kept talking about Believers and the “destiny” that they have in Christ. While I understand and agree with what they are trying to communicate, that God has things He desires for your life,  I have to reject the word “destiny” as an unbiblical word. A devout Calvinist might disagree with me, but “destiny” is not taught in Scripture.

“Destiny” is the Greek idea that there is an “inevitable or necessary fate to which a particular person or thing is destined; one’s lot” or “a predetermined course of events considered as something beyond human power or control.”  (The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, 5th Edition.) It carries with it the idea that, not only is something planned for you, but that you can in no way escape that plan.

However, Scripture teaches that while God is sovereign and all powerful and could make us all fall in line with His perfect desires for us, He does not. Instead, He lays out possibilities in front of us and lets us choose. He says, “Today, I set before you life and death. Choose life that you might live” (Deuteronomy 30:19). With the choice that He lays before His people, God explains the consequences that will accompany the different choices.

This choosing goes all the way back to the garden where God provides everything that Adam and Eve need to live and flourish and commands them to avoid one tree, set in the very center of the garden. He doesn’t then compel them to not eat or compel them to eat–either would have confirmed the idea of destiny; He lets them choose. Had God simply plucked that tree from the garden, there would have been no choosing.

Was there simply no other way this story could have unfolded? Was there really no choice to be made? God knew from the foundations of the world what the outcome would be, and He had a plan of redemption even then. Does that mean that sin was the destiny of mankind? We just had to be sinners, from the very beginning? 

I know I am getting into the philosophical and theological weeds, and most people won’t be interested, and it is not my purpose here to spin questions that we can’t answer in any satisfying manner. My point, my concern is that we ought not use a word like “destiny” that carries with it baggage that doesn’t easily correlate to Biblical teaching. 

In the book I mentioned, The Cure, by John Lynch, Bruce McNicol, and Bill Thrall, the authors define “destiny” as “the ordained intention God has sacredly prepared with your name on it.” Then, a couple of paragraphs down they write, “Tragically, not everyone will fully realize the dreams God holds for them.” This is, however, not destiny. If one can escape it, it is not “destined” to be. That’s what the word “destiny” means. If it is your “destiny,” it will simply happen, no matter what you do.

Why does this distinction matter? The authors of the book The Cure are working to push back against and unravel wrong ideas of what it means to be saved and to walk in the Spirit. They do a very good job of sorting through what it means to live according to the Law and what it means to live by grace. But, destiny is an idea that permeates and pollutes the Christian community. It influences some people to think that if they will just mosey along, eventually they will happen on what God has for them, whether or not they give any attention to seeking after God or growing spiritually. It influences other people to think that the sin they keep falling into is simply an inevitable part of their story, a destined path they were always meant to walk. (BTW, this is not the teaching of The Cure.) 

Linked to the idea of destiny is the belief in the “soulmate.” This too is found in Greek philosophy. It’s the idea that there is really only one person for each one of us, but strangely, although one cannot escape his destiny, one can miss his soulmate and end up searching and longing throughout life for that missing piece–that spot that only one can fill. Some believe that you keep looking for and finding the same soulmate in multiple lives or that if you miss that person in this life, there is always a chance for you to meet again in some other life.

I have had discussions with Christians who are convinced that their spouse is their “soulmate” and that there is no way that they could have married anyone else. God would have prevented that from happening, destiny. Of course, it is only those who have happy, healthy marriages who have this perspective. The danger of this thinking is that it invades the troubled or challenging marriage and a person might come to believe that he or she married the “wrong” person. Instead of committing to learning to love each other and grow together, the idea of the “soulmate” provides an easy way out, in order to keep looking for that one, right person.

But the Bible doesn’t teach this idea. What the Bible does teach about whom to marry is to ask God for wisdom (James 1:5), look at the fruit of a person’s life (Matthew 7), don’t be unequally yoked (2 Corinthians 6:14-16), and seek wise counsel (Proverbs 12:15). And the Bible teaches that God’s desire is for marriage to be a life-long commitment of love and faithfulness on both sides. The Bible does not teach that you couldn’t possibly make a bad choice in choosing a mate. Many have learned that the hard way. 

At its worst, naivety about the importance of careful thought and much prayer before choosing to marry has derailed many a life that had been headed for ministry. How many people spend time fasting and praying before they walk down that aisle? How many have admitted that even as they were getting ready to say “I do,” they were not certain that doing so was the best choice for their lives or even that they “knew” they were making a bad choice? Too many.

I have lived long enough to see many pastors leave ministry because of their wives’ unwillingness to live a life of service to a community of Believers. I have seen many women who longed to be involved and serve in the church, find themselves out of town every weekend because of a husband who does not share their desires (and, of course, this goes both ways). 

So while we are sorting through ideas and thoughts and teachings and separating the worldly perspectives from the Biblical ones, let’s toss out the ideas of “destiny” and “soulmates” as ideas that have some appeal but are not really true, and let’s hone in on the truth and live by it and keep encouraging each other to do the same.

Who Wrote the Book of Life?

Mar19

© Wendy Anne Clark, 2025

The Bible uses many things in the physical world to help us understand things in the spiritual world. For example, the Apostle Paul tells us that Creation reveals things to us about God’s eternal power and divine nature (Romans 1:20). We can observe nature in the physical world and learn something about God and the unseen spiritual world.

God as Father and Jesus as the Son, gives us an insight into the relationship between God the Father and Jesus. It’s not the exact relationship; the Father didn’t get married and bear a child–not in the physical sense. But there is something about a father-son relationship, especially a healthy one, that can help us to understand God as Father and Jesus as Son. They have different roles and are not exactly the same in what they do even as they are the same in nature and character. The Father is holy. The Son also is holy. The Father is trustworthy. The Son also is trustworthy. All of the qualities of the Father also refer to the Son and to the Spirit.

Jesus submits to the will of the Father. “For I have come down from heaven, not to do my own will but the will of Him who sent me” (John 6:38). This is an eternal relationship and not anything new. It has always been (I Corinthians 14:24-28). The problem that we, as human beings, often have is that we do not rightly understand submission. We think of it as making one party lesser or of less significance than the other. But this is a distortion of what God demonstrates to us about submission.

A Bible teacher was once asked, “Is Jesus equal to the Father?” His answer was, “Almost.” Hmmm. While I think I understand where he was going, I don’t agree. Jesus is equal to the Father. They share the same nature and attributes, and yet Jesus willingly submits His will to the Father–His human will. As God, He always shared the Father’s plans and purposes and will.

Jesus also says that the Father gave Him all authority. How is it that the authority had to be given to Him? I’m not sure, but Jesus says that it was. Jesus has all authority even as He submits to the Father. I’m not sure that we can fully wrap our human minds around this relationship, but our human relationships are supposed to help us. I’m sure that is why the enemy is constantly distorting and corrupting our human relationships, to make it harder for us to understand how the Father, Son, and Spirit relate to each other.

The Son willingly submits to the will of the Father and is in agreement with the Father. He speaks only what the Father gives Him to speak (John 12:49). The Spirit willingly submits to the Son and reminds us of the things the Son taught (John 14:26). The Father, Son, and Spirit work in agreement with each other. There is no disagreement, disunity, or rebellion–not ever. Jesus prays that we might have this same kind of unity in the Body of Christ with agreement and willing submission and cooperation. In our case, sin becomes a very real barrier to overcome. There is no sin or selfishness or rebellion within the heart of God.

Marriage of a man and a woman demonstrates something to us of Jesus as a bridegroom and the Church as His bride. Jesus is described as a bridegroom, preparing a place for His bride. When the place is ready, He will return for His bride, and there will be a wedding feast, a celebration. We are meant to attend our wedding celebrations and think of what is planned for the future of all those who are in Christ Jesus. We are meant to watch a loving groom, who is excited for his bride, who is waiting for her and preparing for her, and we are reminded to think of Jesus in this same way, excited for us, waiting for us, preparing for us, and coming back for us.

Will there be an actual feast where we all sit down at a gigantic table and share a meal together? Jesus seems to refer to this at what we call “the Last Supper” when He says, “I tell you I will not drink again of this fruit of the vine until that day when I drink it new with you in my Father’s kingdom” (Matthew 26:29). I imagine a real feast, a real celebration. Think of the most amazing feast that you have ever attended. Something far better is being prepared for us. With all the time to prepare, I anticipate something too amazing to describe.

What then of the Book of Life? Is this an actual physical book, sitting up on a podium somewhere? Are there physical pages to be turned and consulted?

Chad Bird (pastor, professor, scholar) poses an interesting perspective on the Book of Life in his article “How Do I Know My Name is Written in the Book of Life?” He writes, “This book is not a dusty volume laid to rest and forgotten, but a flesh-and-blood testament of the power of an indestructible life, raised for you . . . . Christ Jesus is the Book of Life. In him and him alone our names are written.”

Interesting. 

I have never stopped to think about whether the book is an actual book or just meant to point us to something else. Of course, I have considered the significance of the Book of Life, but I like the idea of looking at the book and seeing a person.

Consider this: Jesus is the Word of God, the logos, spoken in the beginning. He was both with God, and He was God (John 1). Those whose names are written in the Book of Life were written there from the creation of the world (Revelation 17:8). In Ephesians, the Apostle Paul tells us that everyone who is “in Christ” was chosen before the foundation of the world to be adopted as God’s children (Ephesians 1:3-6). God has engraved the names of His people on the palms of His hands (Isaiah 49:16). Is this a reference to the crucifixion and all who would be in Christ? Are those names, written in the Book of Life, also engraved on the palms of the hands of Jesus?

It is in Christ and through His shed blood on the cross for our sins and our repentance and submission to His sacrifice on our behalf, that our names are written in that book, “The Lamb’s Book of Life” (Revelation 21:23-27). The Lamb’s Book contains the names of those who are saved by the Lamb.

So then, is the book an actual book, sitting up on a celestial podium in the spiritual realm? Maybe. It’s quite possible that there will be an actual book that is referenced. It’s also possible that it is simply an image for us to understand the nature of our salvation. It is written down, recorded. It is written in ink and will not be blotted out. It is personal–my name is there–in the book and on the hands of Jesus. My name. Me. It is not a collective recording of the Church as a whole, but of each person who is in Christ Jesus.

And God has known all along that I would respond to the Gospel, run to Jesus, and be saved, and God has determined long ago many things that will be mine because my name is written in the Lamb’s Book of Life.

And if you are in Christ Jesus and have turned to Him as Savior and Lord, your name is written there too.

In the Presence of the King

Jan23

© Wendy Clark, 2025

Brother Lawrence, in his book The Practice of the Presence of God (p 55), writes something along these lines:

What would it be like for the greatest criminal in the world to dine at the king’s table and be served by him, knowing what he had done to break the king’s laws, but not assured of the king’s pardon? Wouldn’t he feel great uneasiness, great fear and trepidation? He would, of course, unless he knew the great goodness and faithfulness of the king and knew indeed that his debt had already been paid, and his pardon was already accomplished.

This is how we, who have been saved by the blood of Jesus, shed in our place, for our sins, sit at the table of the Lord and celebrate in His presence. The more aware we are of our great debt, the more we rejoice in our great and guaranteed pardon. We do not tremble in the presence of One so holy and great–only because we have experienced His amazing grace and mercy.

Hebrews 10:19-23

“Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the holy places by the blood of Jesus, by the new and living way that He opened for us through the curtain, that is, through His flesh, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, with our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.”

True Love

Sep28

© Wendy Anne Clark, 2023

“Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.”  –1 Corinthians 13:4-7, NLT

The world around us has its own definition of love, an ever-changing definition of love. But God tells us what true love is like, and His definition stands firm through the ages, no matter how people change. 

C. S. Lewis understood that what is ultimately for a person’s good is more loving than the things we do to give into a feeling in the moment. God’s love for us is also connected to our ultimate good and not necessarily to the things we desire for ourselves.

In his letter to the Romans Paul writes that “all things work together for good for those who love God and are called according to His purpose” (vs. 28). If we keep reading, we discover that the “good” that Paul is writing about is that we would be conformed to the image of Jesus.

Transformation–the kind that will require us to die to self and allow the Holy Spirit to shape us. This shaping will no doubt require some hard things, some painful experiences, some suffering. It might not always feel like “love” to us. It might not always feel like it’s working for our “good.” We can resist if we want to, but how we respond today is shaping us into who we will be tomorrow.

Son of God and Son of Man

Dec12

© Wendy Clark, December 2021

Son of God

Hannah, my youngest, my late-in-life child, born after I had cancer and chemo, after we stepped out to adopt unsuccessfully twice, after many miscarriages, after I surrendered to God saying, “If I’m not going to have any more children, I’m okay with that, God,” that child–has always been beautiful, loved by pretty much everyone she spends time with, smart, funny, and unusually profound. Even when she was little, sometimes we would be sitting in a room full of adults, and Hannah would say something that would be so interesting, that the room would go silent, and everyone would turn in her direction.  Here’s one memory of that, related to Christmas.

Hannah must have been no older than about four, and our homeschool group was making manger scenes. Hannah made three baby Jesus figures for her manger scene.  I said, “Hannah, you know there was only one baby Jesus, right?”  She said, “Yes, Mom, I know that, but there is God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit, three in one, and I didn’t know how else to show that.”

If you’ve missed that somewhere along the way, don’t miss it this Christmas, that Jesus is God made visible to us.  “Son of God” doesn’t describe an act of God the Father, birthing or creating Jesus, but the intimate relationship that God the Father shares with Jesus. Look at how the writer of Hebrews explains this:

In the past God spoke to our ancestors through the prophets at many times and in various ways, but in these last days he has spoken to us by his Son, whom he appointed heir of all things, and through whom also he made the universe. The Son is the radiance of God’s glory and the exact representation of his being, sustaining all things by his powerful word” (Hebrews 1:1-3).

Jesus is “the exact representation” of God the Father, the best way for us to see what God is like. God the Father, made the universe through Jesus the Son. Jesus was present at creation and participated in creation. The Apostle John explains this just before he begins to write the account of Jesus’ ministry. It is important to John, who lived and traveled with Jesus, that you understand who Jesus really is.

“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made” (John 1:1-3, NIV). “The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth” (John 1:14, NIV).

The “Word” in the Greek means “the expression, the utterance that flowed out of God’s mouth.” Jesus is God and pours out of God. Think about that for a few minutes. When God spoke the universe into existence, Jesus was that expression, the words that flowed out of his mouth.  The Holy Spirit is described as the very breath that God breathed, so that when God breathed life into Adam, that life was by the Spirit of God.

God and his Word and his Breath–three in one–perhaps beyond our ability to understand. 

Maybe it’s easier for us to comprehend the relationship of father to son and the spirit that moves between them, connecting them and making them one, and yet all three also separate and distinct in their identities and their roles. The Bible makes it clear that there are three separate persons–with a shared will, perspective, and purpose–separate and distinct from each other, and at the same time, completely unified.

Many have tried to explain this.  Maybe it’s like an egg that has a shell, a white part, and a yolk and is still all one egg.  Maybe it is like water than can be water and steam and ice and still be essentially the same thing.  These descriptions fall short of what the Bible teaches about God as three in one.

Jesus doesn’t explain how this works; he simply states that it is.  Every time Jesus says “I AM,” He uses the expression that God uses when he speaks to Moses and Moses asks for God’s name.

Moses said to God, ‘Suppose I go to the Israelites and say to them, ‘The God of your fathers has sent me to you,’ and they ask me, ‘What is his name?’ Then what shall I tell them?”

God said to Moses, “I AM who I AM. This is what you are to say to the Israelites: ‘I AM has sent me to you.’ (Exodus 3:13-14). 

What did God just say to Moses?  God’s name translates to something like this:  I am the one who has always existed and who will always exist.  I exist in myself, by myself.  There is no other like me.

Jesus uses this same expression of God’s name to describe himself, which is why the Jewish leaders become so enraged against him and also why it is impossible to view Jesus as simply a good man; good men don’t go around claiming to be God.

Here are seven of these statements just from the testimony of the Apostle John.  In each of these statements Jesus identifies himself as God, I AM GOD who is .  . .

“I AM the bread of life.” (John 6:35, 41, 48, 51)

“I AM the light of the world.” (John 8:12) 

“I AM the door of the sheep.” (John 10:7,9) 

“I AM the resurrection and the life.” (John 11:25) 

“I AM the good shepherd.” (John 10:11, 14) 

“I AM the way, the truth, and the life.” (John 14:6) 

“I AM the true vine.” (John 15:1, 5) 

Jesus also says, “I and the Father are one” (John 10:30), and those who oppose him pick up stones to try to stone him to death and “Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father” (John 14:9).

If you have never heard that Jesus actually taught that he himself is God and the Son of God, not just a prophet of God or a good man sent by God . . .

If you were taught that Jesus was just a man . . .

If you’ve never really thought about Jesus much at all . . .

Consider this particular conversation that Jesus has with his disciples:

When Jesus came to the region of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, “Who do people say the Son of Man is?”

They replied, “Some say John the Baptist; others say Elijah; and still others, Jeremiah or one of the prophets.”

“But what about you?” he asked. “Who do you say I am?”

Simon Peter answered, “You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God.”

Jesus replied, “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah, for this was not revealed to you by flesh and blood, but by my Father in heaven.” (Matthew 16:13-17, NIV)

Jesus refers to himself as the “Son of Man” and then commends Peter for recognizing that he is also the Messiah and the “Son of God.”

If you aren’t sure about all of this or even if you are sure but haven’t given it much thought lately, I encourage you to take some time before Christmas day and read through the Gospel of John, the Apostle John’s account of his encounter with the Son of Man/ Son of God.

As you read, ask and answer these questions:  What does Jesus say about himself?  What does he do?  What does he ask his followers to do?  If all of this is true, what implications does it have for my life? 

Next time . . . more about the Son of Man.

To Tell the Truth

Aug8

Wendy Clark © 2020

A few days ago I stepped on my bathroom scale, and it betrayed me.  The number I saw was inexplicably low.  I stepped off and then stepped on again.  It showed me an even lower number.  I repeated the process, over and over again, and each time it showed me a lower number than before.  I thought to myself, “Oh, no, even my scale is lying to me!”

Lately it seems that lying has become very common, and people will lie about the most unimportant things.  Has this always been, or are people more willing to lie now than they once were?

Years ago my dad had a 16 mm reel of Candid Camera episodes, and in one of the episodes was the Candid Camera team pretending to film a detergent commercial.  The detergent was called “Wham” or “Zam” or something like that.  They set-up a table with two sets of “white” towels.  Both piles looked less than impressive.  Then they stopped people on the street and told them they were filming a commercial and asked if they would pick out the brightest, cleanest looking towels. 

A person would choose a pile, and the host would say something like, “I’m so sorry, but those are not the towels cleaned by our detergent.  Would you like to try again?”  Many people said, “Yes,” and then the crew filmed them selecting the “right” pile of towels.

One woman stood out as honest.  She took a look at both sets of towels and said, “None of these towels is clean.  They all look terrible!”  When the host said, “but this pile over here was cleaned by Wham” (or whatever name they used for the detergent), “If you want to, we can start over and try again.” The woman said, “I don’t care if it was Wham or Zam or whatever, they’re all filthy!”

It was funny to watch, but is it funny that people are willing to lie so that they can be seen in a commercial on TV?  This was filmed back in the 60s.  I don’t think much has changed unless maybe lying has become more common.

Current late-night TV show hosts enjoy going out on the street and questioning people about events that have never occurred.  Many people will talk with great confidence and in great detail about something when they are clearly lying.  On Social media sites people will post pictures that they have clearly manipulated and lie about how “genuine” they are.

Realizing that people will lie when it doesn’t even matter has made me doubly skeptical about how people might lie when they are desperate or frightened or feel out of control.  That’s why I am unlikely to be moved when someone posts the sworn testimony of a person I do not know who has this friend who had such and such happen to them.  It is not good evidence that you have a friend whose dad is an expert in his field who said whatever he said . . . I have no way to determine the honesty of your friend or of your friend’s dad.  It’s all “hearsay,” to use a legal term, even when it’s in a typed post.  Often it is simply Internet gossip that is passed around and around and around. 

One thing I have noticed in these kinds of references to “experts” is that often the “experts” are using the exact same turn of phrase, the soundbites that are used in the news.  This raises a red flag for me.  At the very least, the language they use often reveals a possible political bias that may be influencing the way they present the “facts,” but some people seem completely unaware of these soundbites, even as they use them themselves and reveal where they have been picking up their “news.” 

When my bathroom scale started lying to me, I knew it right away because there are other clear pieces of evidence to consider, like how I look in the mirror, how I feel, and how my clothes fit.  I picked up my scale and turned it over and dusted off the censors on the bottom.  I put it back on the floor and tried again.  This time it gave me a more reasonable number.  It went back to being honest.

But how do we reset a culture populated with people who lie so easily and with such confidence and very little noticeable remorse?  If only “liar, liar, pants on fire” was really a thing, but then perhaps we would have all been badly burned by now. 

One of the Scriptures that has most influenced me to reject lying and tell the truth is when Jesus says this, “You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father’s desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.” (John 8:44).  The enemy of my soul is the father of lies?  I don’t want to give him any foothold in my life!

A few years ago I spent a whole year studying honesty and what it means to be truly honest according to Scripture.  God is completely honest.  There is “no shadow of turning” in Him, not even a shade of manipulating or enhancing or downplaying or withholding or many other things that people are apt to do when they aren’t being completely honest. To be truly honest requires that we submit to the refining fire of the Holy Spirit, every minute of every day.  I am convinced that we can continue to grow in our understanding of honesty and our ability to be honest for as long as we live. In this life there will be no end to pulling at the threads of what we may not yet see as lying–to ourselves, to others, to God.  It is a continuous, ever- deepening process if we are willing to submit to it. 

Here are some of the other things that the Bible teaches about lying and honesty.

Proverbs 11:3
“The integrity of the upright guides them, but the unfaithful are destroyed by their duplicity.”

Proverbs 12:22
“The LORD detests lying lips, but He delights in people who are trustworthy.”

Proverbs 13:5
“The righteous hate what is false, but the wicked make themselves a stench and bring shame on themselves.”

Proverbs 19:1
“Better is a poor person who walks in his integrity than one who is crooked in speech and is a fool.”

Colossians 3:9 (the Apostle Paul to Believers)
“Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices.”

Philippians 4:8-9 (the Apostle Paul to Believers)
“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.”

Clashing Worldviews

Jun9

By Wendy Clark © 2020

Sometimes, maybe a lot of the time, we make the mistake of thinking that everyone else sees the world the same way we do or that if we could just talk persuasively enough, others would shift directions and see the world the way that we see it. The “right” way.

We’ve all seen the written shouting matches going back and forth on social media.  Most of us have been caught off guard when we have posted something heartfelt and were met with hostility from people we think of as “friends.” We may have responded with a harsh answer back, or with silence, or with more explanation, or by deleting the entire conversation, or even by blocking the other person from ever engaging with us again. 

In 2020, it has become clearer than it has been in a long time, that we are living in an age of clashing worldviews.  No matter who you are and how you see the world, you can be pretty sure that you see the world differently than many of those around you: co-workers, neighbors, friends, even people in your own family.  

We all see the world from a perspective that has been shaped by our experiences and how we have interpreted and responded to those experiences.  Our interpretation of events is an interweaving of what we see, hear, feel, and believe.

When something happens to us in life, especially something uncomfortable, painful, or traumatic, we try to make meaning out of the experience, to find a place to categorize the what happened to us.

We tend to play what happened  over and over in our minds, the order of all of the little pieces, all of the details, but we don’t just sort through the facts; we have feelings attached to what happened, whether we recognize and acknowledge those feelings or not, and what we feel shapes our understanding of what we experienced, sometimes correctly, and sometimes incorrectly.

I think back to a very turbulent time in my life, back when I was in the 6th grade.  Someone who did business with my dad–a man who was a missionary–cheated my dad out of a lot of money.  This threw our family into an economic crisis.  

I was attending a small Christian school at the time and had been there since kindergarten. I was with the same kids every year and had known most of them from the beginning. My parents had sacrificed to pay for us to attend there, and we had received scholarships and other financial help as well.  But now we could no longer afford to stay, so suddenly in 6th grade, I was entering a K-6 public school, knowing only a few of the kids that lived on my block.

What a relief that this turned out to be a great school and a great situation for me!  I loved my sweet teacher.  I was put in a challenging, interesting, and fun class.  I was making friends.  But then . . .

To deal with our financial situation, we had to sell our house and rent a house in another neighborhood.  I didn’t really understand how public schools worked and that this would mean I would need to change schools again.  One day during school, the principal called me into her office to tell me that I would have to leave the school and go to a different school, closer to where we had moved.

I remember that I was completely shocked and devastated as this woman, who looked so cold and uncaring delivered the news, watched me break down into sobbing, and never said one kind or compassionate word. 

I asked her why I couldn’t just stay and finish out the year.  I had already switched schools once, and we would all be changing again the next year for junior high.  She responded to me in a tone that I remember being harsh and unkind:

“I can’t even get my own daughter into this school.  Why should you get to go to school here?”

She sent me back to class a complete wreck.  My kind teacher felt very bad and said she would do what she could to help me stay, but I had to leave anyway.  She did have the class write to me a few times, which was very kind.

I am stunned by the fact that I started crying as I was writing this, some 45 years later.

The new school experience was terrible for me.  The class of the motivated and engaged students was full, and I was put in a class with the lower academic students.  I was pulled out of the class for an advanced reading group and a few other things during the week, but it was clear what kind of class this was, and all of us in that class (and all the kids in the other class) knew it was the class for ‘the dumb kids.”

For a long time I didn’t have any friends in my class, and one girl at the school kept trying to bully me.  I use the word “tried” because I stood up to her, but it was a difficult and troubling time for me.

A few weeks after I had moved to the new school, my family and I were eating in a restaurant when the principal for the other school walked in.  I felt sick to my stomach.  Then I was filled with rage so powerful that I didn’t know what to do.  I remember silently praying over and over, “Jesus, help me! Jesus, help me!”

Why was that woman so unkind to a young girl who was clearly devastated?  I have often wondered about her, and I have had to forgive her over and over again.  Even now, I find myself having to forgive her as I write this and to choose to think merciful thoughts about her. I doubt she ever had any idea of what effect her words, actions, and attitudes had on me, and how even the memory of them still has the power to affect me.

And recent events have brought this childhood experience to mind yet again because I started wondering how I might have interpreted this event if I had been a black little girl, facing that unloving white woman across the desk in her office.  Would I have been sure of her motives, sure of her heart?  Would I have “known” that her attitude toward me was because of my skin color?

I was white, and she was white, so of course it never occurred to me that her harshness was due to racism because it was not.  I don’t know why she behaved the way she did.  I think it had something to do with her wanting her daughter to go to the school where she was a principal, but I had nothing to do with whatever was going on there.  She didn’t speak to me with kindness or compassion.  She didn’t try to help me.  Why not?  I don’t know, and I can’t imagine that I ever will.

As I think back on that experience, I’m struck by how what we believe about God plays a part in how we interpret events, both how we relate to Him, and how we understand Him to relate to us.

When I was filled with a sickening rage against this woman for how she had treated me, I started praying because I understood, even then, that the source of my strength and help was and is the LORD. I also understood that holding onto those feelings was not good for me, and that I needed a way to release them, to release her, and to move forward in my life. 

What we believe about other people, how we see them, and how we believe they see us, also plays a part in how we shape our experiences, and because that is true, I recognize that my memory of those events may not be completely accurate.  I remember that principal as being cold and uncaring and for certain she said nothing kind to me, and she didn’t help me in any way.  I still wonder why she called me into her office during the school day to give me that news.  Why didn’t she call my parents?  Why wasn’t my mom there with me? What did the principal think was going to happen? 

But maybe she was moved by my distress, and I didn’t perceive it.  Maybe she was caught by surprise by my reaction.  My memory of her as being hard and uncaring is part of how I interpreted what I saw and heard and felt that day.  The evidence seems to support that interpretation, but it can’t reveal what the woman was thinking or feeling on that day or why she behaved the way she did.

Fast forward many years to an encounter with another woman who appeared to be cold and unfeeling. 

I was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma when I was 32 and had two daughters, ages 2 and 4 months old. It was a shocking and devastating time for my whole family.  Again I found myself sitting in an office across from a woman who seemed unmoved as she laid out to my husband and me treatment plans and what we could expect. Although we had an appointment early that day, we had waited for several hours before getting in to see this doctor.  We were on edge, and she was expressionless. I went out of that room feeling like the doctor was a competent but hard woman.

Months later, after I had finished my treatment, was cancer free, and was coming back for a follow-up appointment, one of the nurses talked of what she remembered that first day.  She said that she knew from the beginning that I was going to be okay because I had a positive attitude and I was looking to the future.  Then she said something that surprised me.

She said that after our meeting, the doctor sat in her office for a while and cried.  She talked to the nurse about her great grief at the young women with cancer that she was treating.  (Another of her patients also had a baby and was being treated for cancer.) The doctor herself was pregnant.  She was overwhelmed by imagining what it might be like to have a new baby and be diagnosed with cancer.  She was struggling to “keep it together.”

When we have a bad experience that is connected to someone else, we want to know why people do the things they do.  We often make up our minds about why they do those things, and our worldview plays a big part in what we decide is true about other peoples’ hearts and motives.

But we have no way of knowing what is inside the heart of someone else.  Sometimes we are not even able to see our own hearts clearly.  The Bible talks about this problem:  

“Every way of a person is right in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the heart” (Proverbs 21:2).

When Samuel was sent by God to anoint the person who would be the next king of Israel, he was distracted by what he could see and what he thought about who should be king. God corrected Samuel when he incorrectly picked out the person he thought should be king: 

“Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart” (I Samuel 16:7).

We can’t see inside to the heart.  We can see lots of clues, and we are told to look for those clues, the things people say, the things people do  (what the Bible calls “fruit”) in order to have some understanding about who is trustworthy and truthful, but in the end, we can’t really know why people do what they do.

“Therefore do not pronounce judgment before the time, before the Lord comes, who will bring to light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the heart . . .” (I Corinthians 4:5).

Motives and intentions are something that we can’t really know and we have to leave to a future time when God will reveal those deeper things that for now remain hidden.

Because we are such complex people, with so many things that shape how we see the world, God tells us not to use the world around us as the guide for interpreting events.  Instead, we are to replace whatever worldview we have come to have with a Biblical worldview.  We are to line up our thinking with God’s thinking.

The Apostle Paul writes, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect” (Romans 12:2).

We must actively resist thinking like the world thinks by renewing our minds and being transformed.  How do we do that?  We surrender our thoughts, to God’s thoughts.  We let the Word of God shape us.

Jesus prayed for those who would follow Him, that the Father would sanctify us (transform, purify, refine) in the truth, and then He said this, “Your Word is truth” (John 17:17).

So if I can’t know why people do the things they do, then what am I supposed to do with all the bad things that others have done to hurt me?  

The Apostle Paul writes, “Since God chose you to be the holy people He loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others” (Colossians 3:12-13).

I can choose how I will think of other people.  I can choose to think of the principal with mercy and to forgive her even though I do not understand why she did what she did. I can choose to remember that doctor as a person, as a woman struggling with her own hopes, dreams, and fears.

The Apostle Paul also writes, “The purpose of my instruction is that all believers would be filled with love that comes from a pure heart, a clear conscience, and genuine faith” (I Timothy 1;5).

And to the believers at Philippi, he writes, “Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves” (Philippians 2:3).

I can examine myself, comparing myself against the Word of God, I can agree with what God says is true and reject what I think or feel when it is contrary to God’s word. I can surrender and submit my thoughts, ideas, attitudes, and feelings, even my memories to make them obedient to God’s Word.

No, I don’t know the motives behind the things that you say and do.  I don’t know your heart and all the places where it has been hurt and broken.

Here’s what I do know about you:  You were made in the image of God (Genesis 1:27).  God knew you before you were even born (Psalm 139:13-15).  God knows everything about you (Psalm 139:1-6).  God loves you (John 3:16).  God’s desire is that you would know Him (2 Peter 3:9). God wants me to love you even if you are not kind and loving toward me (Matthew 5:44). God’s goal is for you and I to live in peace and unity, and that we would love each other (Psalm 133;1-3).

None of these truths hinge on your experiences or my experiences.  They are true whether you or I believe them or not. And as I was taught long ago, the only two things from this world that will last forever are people, and the Word of God.

So we ought to give great care to both.