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Why Do We Believe (or Not)?

Jul13

© Wendy Anne Clark, 2026

A while back Jennifer Aniston appeared on the podcast Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard  and made an old well-worn argument about faith, claiming that we only believe what we believe because of how and where we were raised. The argument is basically this: if you were raised by a Mormon family, you will be a Mormon; if you were raised Muslim, you will be a Muslim; if you were raised in a Christian family, you will be a Christian.

At first glance, this seems true, or at least mostly true. Most people do follow the religious teaching that they were raised in, atheists included. 

At second glance, however, we see that how you were raised is no guarantee of what you will believe as you move into adulthood. Throughout all of history, we find examples of people who walked away from the religious tradition they were raised in, for many different reasons. Most of us can think of more than a few families where one or more children heads down a different, unexpected religious path.

Jennifer Aniston then claims that people of faith lack the critical-thinking skills required to examine their own beliefs, but how does she come to this conclusion? There have been enough intelligent educated Christians, deep thinkers of faith to challenge the idea that one can’t be both a critical thinker and a Christian. There have been enough scientists who are Christians to demonstrate that you can be a scientific thinker and also a believer. There have been rich and poor Christians, educated and uneducated, in all fields of study–too many to easily dismiss Christians as poor or uneducated or lacking the ability to think.

What evidence do we have that Jennifer Aniston is herself a critical thinker and has carefully examined and evaluated her lack of belief?

The problem with Jennifer Aniston’s argument is that it is rooted in the physical, material, world. According to her theory, where a person was physically born and raised and what that person was taught in the physical world is the biggest determining factor of how that person will believe. But this argument neglects to consider the spiritual aspect of who we are and how we are brought to faith in the spiritual.

What if we consider this question from a Biblical perspective? What does God reveal to us through His word about how we come to believe and the question of being born into an unbelieving culture?

Here’s what I see as I study the Bible:

God determined when and where each person would be born and live so that each person would have their best opportunity to seek after God, find Him, and be saved. That’s how I interpret what Paul says in Acts 17:26-27:

“And He made from one man every nation of mankind to live on all the face of the earth, having determined allotted periods and the boundaries of their dwelling place, that they should seek God, and perhaps feel their way toward Him and find Him. Yet He is actually not far from each one of us . . .”

As I understand what Paul is saying, Jennifer Aniston was born in the best time and place for her to come to the point where she would seek after God, find Him, and be saved. Being born into a different family, in a different time and place would not have presented a better opportunity for her to be saved. 

How can this be? Because God knows what He is doing, and it is by His Spirit that we are saved, and the Holy Spirit is not hindered by time and space and the circumstances of our upbringing. In fact, He can use unusual circumstances to His own advantage. Coming to faith in Jesus is a spiritual activity, not a physical one. Jesus says this, “No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them” (John 6:44).

Many people do continue to believe exactly what their parents believed and taught them. Yes. Ungodliness is carried on, generation after generation. And godliness is carried on, generation after generation. And yet . . . at any time, any one person can step outside of the pattern, the long strand, woven throughout history, and head in a new direction, and carry all those who come after them in a new direction. This happens on both sides of faith.

My mother’s parents were Christians. They raised four children. Only my mom consistently followed Jesus and raised her children in the Christian faith. The other three children all made other choices, which are reflected in the turmoil their children experienced. Some of those children know and follow Jesus, and others do not. 

My father’s parents were not Christians and lived very worldly lives, yet my dad responded to the Gospel and was saved when he was in college. He married my mom, and they raised their five children in the Christian faith. All of the children believe, but not all have followed exactly the same. 

If you are a Christian, you can teach your children and live in such a way that you make it easier for them to believe. You can remove barriers that otherwise might hinder their faith, but they will still have to choose, and there is nothing you can do to guarantee the choice they will make. Jennifer Aniston talks about being born into a Greek Orthodox tradition, which she describes in terms that make it seem strange and scary. Interestingly, she did not adopt the religion of her ancestors. Why not? And doesn’t the fact that she chose differently undermine her claim?

Oprah Winfrey talks about growing up in the Baptist tradition but rejecting her family’s faith when encountering  teaching about God that she did not understand and did not explore in any depth: that God is a “jealous God.”  If the God of the Bible is “jealous,” she surmised, He can’t be perfect and holy, therefore, He is disproved in her eyes. On her show she once stated that there is no way that Jesus could be the only way to God because too many people have been born in times and places where they did not hear about Jesus. This too is an argument from the physical and material, rather than the spiritual.

The Bible, which is a collection of writings which God has used to tell us about Himself, about the world around us, and about us as humans, tells us that God can reveal Himself to anyone, anywhere, in any way that He wants to and that His first revelation to all people is through everything that He has made.

Romans 1:18-20

“For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who by their unrighteousness suppress the truth. For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them. For His invisible attributes, namely, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse.”

God can reveal salvation and Jesus at any time, to anyone.

How are Abraham and Moses and David saved? By believing that they are sinners and that God is the only source of their salvation. Can they reject Jesus and be saved? No. Jesus provided the way of their salvation even though they were looking forward to that day. In their time, the Law and the Prophets revealed the truth about God to them. When they believed and lived according to faith, God called this “righteousness.”


Hebrews 1:1-2

“Long ago, at many times and in many ways, God spoke to our fathers by the prophets, but in these last days He has spoken to us by His Son, whom he appointed the heir of all things, through whom also He created the world.”

Genesis 15:5-6, ESV

“And He brought him outside and said, ‘Look toward heaven, and number the stars, if you are able to number them.’ Then He said to him, ‘So shall your offspring be.’ And he believed the Lord, and He counted it to him as righteousness.”

Whole books have been written on this topic. Obviously, I’ve barely skimmed the surface here, but if you really want to understand how people before Christ are saved, the Bible does address this question, and many have argued that the same principles apply to those born in times and places where Christ was not preached to them.

My argument is that time and place doesn’t matter because God is bigger. Here are a few testimonies I have encountered along the way that support this idea. It is not difficult to find people who will testify to this truth. Listen to their stories and weigh how persuasive they are in supporting this point.

The first account I retell here comes from a missionary and what happened in a tribe. I’m telling it in my own words as I remember it told to me:

A tribal warrior set out into the jungle to spend time with the Great Spirit and receive his commissioning. As he was out in nature, he looked around and acknowledged all of the beauty and order and magnificence of nature, and he recognized that a Mighty Creator must be behind all that he could see. “If You are willing,” he asked, “show yourself to me.” Mist began to rise up from the jungle floor. 

At that moment a Great Chief came out of the mist of the jungle and approached him. The tribal warrior was terrified, and fell to his knees. The Great Chief identified himself as “Jesus” and told the tribal warrior that he should get in his canoe, travel down the river to the village, and look for the missionary in the hut with a cross on the roof. “When you find the missionary,” the Great Chief told him, “Ask him to tell you about me. Then go back to your village and tell your people.” Then the Great Chief disappeared in the mist.

The tribal warrior followed the instructions that he had been given and got in his canoe and traveled to the village to look for the missionary. When he found the hut with the cross and the missionary inside, he told the missionary of his encounter with the Great Chief and of how the Great Chief told him to ask the missionary to tell him about this chief whose name was Jesus.

The missionary told the warrior of who Jesus is, how He was sent by His Father, God, the Creator of all things, to come to earth and live a perfect life as a human, and die as the perfect and final sacrifice for the sins of all of mankind. Of how this Jesus was executed and then three days later, rose up from the dead, walked the earth and taught for 40 more days before ascending into heaven to sit at the right hand of His Father, God, and of how He promised that He will return again, and that all who believe in Him and follow Him will be saved and spend eternity with Him. 

The tribal warrior believed and repented of his sins, determined to become a follower of this Great Chief named Jesus.

This missionary asked him, “What did He look like?”

The tribal warrior described Him as a fierce and Mighty warrior with a magnificent headdress and full war paint, an awesome sight.

The tribal warrior went back to his village as he had been instructed and told all of the people there about this Great Chief named Jesus. Most of the people believed and repented and determined that they would follow Jesus.

How can someone who lives in a place where Jesus has never been preached about come to believe in Jesus? This is one way. God can bring the message to the person.

Here is a testimony I heard personally when I was visiting a church in Yreka, California: 

A Japanese woman told of how when she was a little girl, living in Japan, she would lie out on the grass and look at the night sky, filled with stars and think about who would be so magnificent as to create all of these beautiful things. “If You are real, I would like to meet You,” she said into the night.

She lived a sad and broken life, and eventually lived in an orphanage where an American couple came and found her, adopted her, and took her home as their own child. They were a Christian couple and took her to church every Sunday, and through them, she turned to Jesus Christ as her Savior.

She was in her twenties when it occurred to her that God had answered that prayer that she had prayed while looking up at the stars as a little girl. “I would like to meet you,” she had prayed, and God had answered, “I can make that happen.”

How can someone who has never heard about Jesus come to believe in Him? This is one way. God can bring the person to the message.

Here’s a story I read about a young man coming to Jesus while living in a Muslim nation:

A young man was trying to be faithful and obedient in serving Allah. He had been told that there was no way to know Allah personally, but that didn’t feel right to him. No way at all? 

He looked at everything around him, and to him it seemed that there was a Creator who was speaking to mankind, and he prayed that if that were true, the Creator would reveal Himself in a way that he could understand. 

That night he had a dream. In the dream he was riding the bus, as he did every day. The bus approached a corner that he often saw but had never gotten off the bus to explore.

In his dream, he got off the bus, walked across the street, and saw a man with a green satchel over his shoulder. He approached the man, and the man reached into the bag and pulled out something and put it into his hands. He took whatever it was and put it into his pocket, walked back across the street, and got onto the next bus to continue his ride. This is where his dream ended, and he woke up.

The next day, he was on that bus, and as he approached the corner that he had seen in his dream, he saw the man with the satchel from his dream, standing on that corner, so he got off the bus, crossed the street, approached the man, and put out his hand as he had in the dream. The man reached into his bag and pulled out a Bible, and put it into his hand. He took the Bible and tucked it into his pocket as he had in the dream and went back across the street to take the next bus to his destination.

Later, when he returned home, he took out the Bible, and realizing that he had it in his possession only by a supernatural event, he began to read and study it. He, like many other Muslims before him, would read that Bible, cover to cover, seven times, before he decided that it was true and that he would completely surrender his life and become a follower of Jesus.

How can someone who has never encountered the Bible come to read it and to know Jesus as His Savior? This is one way. God Himself can orchestrate events to put the Bible in His hands.

Here’s another similar story:

A group of Christians determined that they would bring Bibles into Vietnam, but they were prevented from distributing them and ended up wrapping them in plastic and burying them at random places in the jungle. Years later, during the Vietnam War, Vietnamese soldiers would find these Bibles, perfectly intact, and read them, and many would turn to Jesus and be saved.

God is not bound by time and space. If you think that where or when a person is born is a hindrance to them coming to know Jesus and following Him, your idea of God is far too limited.

You may live in a physical location or in circumstances that make it more likely that you would believe in Jesus and be saved,  but the Holy Spirit moves in the spiritual realm and interacts with hearts and minds, and He is not hindered by time or space.

And everyone, no matter where or when they have lived, has been able to perceive God through all that He has made. God calls to each one of us through creation. It is an open invitation to find Him.

I picture how this works like a game of tag. God created all things, and then He stands back and says, “Tag. You’re it.” And He points out to you all the things He has made and all that they reveal about who He is.

When you look and seek and take even the tiniest step of faith in His direction, and you say something like, “God, if You’re real, please show Yourself to me,” it’s like you’ve reached out your hand to touch him and said, “Tag, You’re it.”

And then God responds back to you, revealing more truth to you.

God is not hiding from you. He’s waiting for you to look and see and seek after Him. He’s waiting for you to want to know more.

Many people say something like, “Prove it to me, and I’ll believe.” But God says something like this: “Look around at what you already know. Believe and take a step of faith. And I will prove it to you.”

Jennifer Anniston’s conclusion about faith reveals that she has in mind a very small and limited version of God, not the God of the Bible. How big is God? Is He able to do far beyond all that we could ask or imagine? (The Apostle Paul, Ephesians 3:20) 

How is it that many people throughout history have come to Jesus in the most hostile of conditions? Can we trust that God is big enough and good enough and creative enough to work out the details of drawing people to Himself?

If you aren’t so sure, start listening to people tell their stories of how the Holy Spirit found them, drew them to Jesus, brought them to believe, and changed them. Seek the truth, don’t just settle for what you have always believed.

It’s quite possible that Jennifer Aniston lives in a bubble, surrounded by people who make the same assumptions and that it hasn’t occurred to her to go looking outside of that bubble for the TRUTH.

If you have been convinced that all truth is relative, that there is no truth to search for, you will likely stay in your bubble and accept whatever you can easily perceive through your senses. 

But if you want to know the TRUTH, that which is established outside of what we think, experience, and imagine, you are going to have to do some looking and some true critical thinking.

Lamentations 3:22-25

“The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; His mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. ‘The Lord is my portion,’ says my soul, ‘therefore I will hope in Him.’ The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks Him.”

Isaiah 55:6-11

“Seek the Lord while He may be found; call upon Him while He is near; let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts; let him return to the Lord, that He may have compassion on him, and to our God, for He will abundantly pardon.

“‘For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways,’ declares the Lord. ‘For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts’.

“‘For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven and do not return there but water the earth, making it bring forth and sprout, giving seed to the sower and bread to the eater, so shall My word be that goes out from My mouth; it shall not return to Me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it.’”

Jennifer Aniston | Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard

Another Birthday

Jan19

© Wendy Anne Clark, 2026

Another year has passed, and like many before it, it was a very quick year, and still a lot happened. There were some big events: at the beginning of the year, our daughter Heather and her husband Phil had their first child, our first grandchild, Luke, and we flew to Marseille soon after he was born to meet him. Roy and I, along with Haley and Hannah, took a trip to visit the family again at the beginning of June. Two trips to France, flying “standby,” which is its own kind of adventure. We took a trip to the Grand Canyon and attended the wedding of our niece, Karli, in Arizona. We traveled to see a Christmas concert in Chicago–Michael W. Smith, Amy Grant, CeCe Winans. 

I continued immunotherapy treatments for endometrial cancer while, at the same time, a friend with a similar diagnosis, on a similar timeline, chose to stop her cancer treatments and went to be with Jesus. I don’t know how to process the similarities and differences in our journeys, but they have caused me to lean even more heavily into Jesus and to trust more firmly in God’s plans for me, whatever they may be.

We moved to a new house again this year. We have now lived in 6 houses in the 11 years that we have been in the Wood River Valley. This move was unexpected because at the end of 2024, the owner of the house assured us that we would be able to sign a new lease for another year at the end of April, 2025, but, in March, she changed her mind and told us we would need to leave by April 30th. Unexpected and certainly inconvenient since I had surgery in March, and Roy had surgery in April, and neither of us could lift boxes or move furniture. But . . . we were able to hire movers to help us this time, and we had the help of many friends, so we were settled into a new house at the first of May.

Though we continued to look for a new location for the Coffee House and the House Church, we were unable to find a place that would work, and we moved church to the new house–a beautiful place with lots of room and a pastor and his wife as landlords. We recognize this house as a very gracious gift from God at just the right time.

Most of life, however, is not made up of the big events, but the ordinary, everyday ones, interspersed with challenges and celebrations. Every day, meeting with God in the morning, as I have done for decades now. Studying through Isaiah, starting Jeremiah and Proverbs, re-reading and reflecting on The Practice of the Presence of God, reading Dallas Williard’s book Renovation of the Heart, biographies of Mother Theresa and Lottie Moon, several novels by Charles Martin, and too many Bible study books to name.

Praying daily through long lists of prayer requests for family and friends and strangers. Writing articles and talks, filming YouTube videos, listening and watching personal testimonies of faith and videos on apologetics. 

For women’s Bible study we worked through the Navigator’s book Growing Strong in God’s Family. Our group went through some growth, from a consistent two, to a consistent seven or eight, something that God decided to do. I continued preparing for and leading worship for our church service and cooking dinners each week. 

Every Sunday, I met with two groups of ladies at the jail for worship and Bible study. It’s difficult to express how meaningful this is in my life and all that God is teaching me through this experience. I am so thankful for this opportunity. If you ever get the opportunity to serve, and on the surface it looks like “work,” don’t be afraid to step up and step in. Don’t miss the amazing things God will do when we just keep showing up.

Last year, at the first of the year, I chose the word “new” for a spiritual focus for the year. I reflected on these two passages:

Remember Not–Isaiah 43:18-19

“Remember not the former things,
    nor consider the things of old.
Behold, I am doing a new thing;
    now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?
I will make a way in the wilderness
    and rivers in the desert.”

Remember–Isaiah 46:9-10

“Remember the former things of old;
for I am God, and there is no other;
    I am God, and there is none like me,
declaring the end from the beginning
    and from ancient times things not yet done,
saying, ‘My counsel shall stand,
    and I will accomplish all my purpose.”

What new things did I encounter? New grandson, new home, new ideas, new friends, new visitors to church, new group of ladies at the jail, new understanding about God’s plans, God’s purposes, and God’s ways.

I had to let go of my vision of the Coffee House and the House Church and wait on God for what He wants to do next and how He wants to do it. We are still expecting that we will have a neutral ministry location to reach out to and to connect with our community, a version of the Coffee House, but it will not be what it was before. We perceive that God is doing a new thing. We don’t yet fully know what that will look like.

My word for this year is “rescue,” and the verse that has brought focus to the word is Proverbs 24:11:

“Rescue those who are being taken away to death;
hold back those who are stumbling to the slaughter.”

God’s purpose for me is that I would do my part to reach out to rescue those who are lost and perishing, to act as an ambassador on God’s behalf and call out loudly: “Be reconciled to God” and then to point to Jesus as the only way of salvation.

The door to the ark is open, and the storm clouds are gathering overhead, but only those who will enter into the way of salvation that God has provided will be saved. All those who seek to save themselves in some other way will be lost. There were no life boats, floating around the outside of the ark. And when the time was right — God Himself shut the door.

So this year, I will focus on what it means to reach out to rescue those who are perishing, to pull back from the edge those who are teetering over the cliff. I will focus on having a greater sense of the urgency of sharing the Gospel and even more boldness and courage.

“And pray also for me, that words may be given to me in opening my mouth boldly to proclaim the mystery of the gospel . . . Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should” (Ephesians 6:19-20).

And now I am 62, and I look forward to another year walking with Jesus and growing in knowledge, understanding, and wisdom. 

The Shifting Culture of Higher Education

Apr5

© Wendy Clark,  2025

I have been thinking about my college teaching experience as well as some of the ideological battles that have been taking place over the past few years. I began teaching college writing and critical thinking classes in California in 1991 and taught part-time until we moved to Idaho in 2014. I was not unhappy when I left, but I had observed so many changes over the years, and I may well have left at just the right time for me.

I still love teaching, and I loved teaching and cared about my students in the couple of decades that I taught. I found it to be a very rewarding job. Here are some of the changes I saw over the years that were leading to the “woke” culture that many have referenced as taking over many colleges and universities.

I’m not sure of the timeline, but a colleague who was the head of the English Department and was a white woman, was accused of being a racist. This sweet and kind woman who was loved by many faculty and students and was defended by many, found that she could not “prove” that she wasn’t a racist.

The “evidence” brought forward–by another colleague–was very weak and to me seemed to be manufactured and manipulated. The result was that the head of the English department became an elected position, rather than an appointed one. The woman who brought forward the charges against the current head was elected to that position–just once. The woman who lost her position continued to teach and to prepare for her retirement, but she was wounded by all that had been said about her. 

I saw no evidence that shifting this position to an elected position instead of a position that was appointed by the head of the Language Arts Department benefited those of us teaching in the English Department. The woman who brought the charges and then was elected to the position was not better at it than the woman who had held that position for some time and was experienced at it. The primary way I was personally affected by the person holding that position was that she was in charge of assigning teaching assignments. The appointed woman had been very skilled at that task. The newly elected woman, not so much. She was a “woman of color.” Did that make her better at the job? Not so much. I preferred the women who previously held the position primarily because she had been very helpful and encouraging, and I had learned a lot from her. I had no real interaction with the woman newly elected to this position.

I remember a faculty meeting where this woman talked about how frightened she was as a woman of color every time that she went to the bathroom by herself. I asked if there had been any incidents at the college that I wasn’t aware of. Had anyone been accosted in the restroom? This was important to me because I often taught in the evenings and might go to the restroom at 10:00 at night.

The colleague answered, “no” to my question, but said that didn’t matter because it was her feeling of being afraid that mattered, not whether or not any incident had ever occurred. This was Napa Valley College, and there were no cases of violence or threat or gangs at that time. I had taught in both Santa Ana and San Pablo where there were actual cases of threat and gangs and violence and real reasons to be fearful and careful. 

In the late 90s, a colleague told me that I should apply for a full-time job right away if I ever wanted to work full time. She said, “We probably will only hire maybe one more white woman for many years to come. After that, there will be no more full-time jobs available for white women.” My youngest child was only 4 at the time and that colleague said that was when she went full time when her youngest was 4. Although I thought at that time that I would teach full time some day, I did not feel the time was right, but I made note of the fact that my gender and my skin color could  affect my ability to get a full-time position at the college where I loved teaching.

Later, after all that had happened to the woman who had been heading up the English department left a very bad taste in my mouth, I lost interest in ever teaching at this particular college full-time. As a part-timer I could avoid attending staff meetings and all the tension that they brought. I also could avoid some of the strange things that full-timers were sometimes asked to do. If you didn’t pay a part timer for it, you couldn’t require it, but more about that later.

Around that same time, I started to read more student essays that seemed to be rewriting history into some new version that I didn’t recognize. I had many conversations with students about the things they were learning in their history classes. One of the of things I remember from that time was an oversimplification of the conflict between native Americans and the colonists, with the colonists presented as the “bad guys” and the native Americans as the “victims.” There seemed to be no understanding of the clash of cultures (with colonists who believed in private property ownership and tribes who did not) or the fear stirred up by the violence of certain tribes as well as how some tribes came to fear settlers based on the behaviors of some. 

There was no discussion of the tribes that were known to be peaceful and the tribes that were known to be violent. There was no thought given to how colonization was viewed at that time in most parts of the world and little understanding of the different groups of Europeans who came to the “new world,” the different reasons for which they came, and the different interactions that they had with native Americans when they arrived. 

Another oversimplified narrative that was rising up at that time was that the United States at its inception was somehow unusual in its practice of slavery. Students were unaware that slavery at that time was present in every country in the world. There were even Africans who participated by enslaving and selling their own people. They were also unaware of the white people around the world who were also sold as servants and shipped away from where they were born and from their family members. This was not an “American” thing or a white/black thing, or sadly, even an unusual thing, but students were being taught to think that way.

There was also a false narrative of how the Founding Fathers viewed slavery. The fact that slavery continued to exist as long as it did was used as evidence that they did not want to get rid of it. Students were unaware of all of the writings by the Founding Fathers, including Thomas Jefferson, in which they discussed how they might end slavery and what that would require. They didn’t know that it was the western nations that first outlawed slavery. Again, this was an issue of oversimplification, something that we talked a lot about in my critical thinking classes, where the primary questions we always asked were “Is this true?” and “How do we know?” and “Where can we go to find out?”

A student was writing his research paper on immigration and was critical of  United States’ immigration laws. I asked him to include in his paper a discussion of immigration laws from other countries around the world. He was shocked to discover that he, as an American citizen, couldn’t just move to and live in any country he wanted. He hadn’t realized that there were immigration laws in most countries. How had this been overlooked in the discussions he was having in his other class at the college?

One of the things I love about teaching is having relationships with students and having really good discussions about all kinds of different things. Over time, this was becoming more challenging. All of us faculty members were being instructed to not share anything that might be construed as “advice” to students. They should be sent to the counseling department where presumably the counselors had been trained in how to give advice. This is a direction that I accepted but only up to the point of my rights as an American citizen to share my thoughts and opinions as my thoughts and opinions. I found it interesting that the concern was directed most often toward conservative ideas even though far-left professors were teaching things as “true” that were not true at all. Conservative professors were far more likely than their left counterparts to entertain many different perspectives in the classroom and to avoid sharing their own opinion as the only correct option. My left-leaning colleagues were the ones most likely to be described by students as “hammering” their positions in the classroom and “punishing” students for expressing a dissenting opinion.

There were many times that I had students come to my office, close the door, and then ask my opinion about things like religion, marriage, church, or how to handle a hostile instructor. According to the law, I could answer anything that an adult student asked me as long as I was clear that I was offering my own ideas and opinions, and I kept to that standard. But more and more the pressure was rising to never talk to students about anything personal.

One of the other pressures that I encountered as an instructor was to give passing grades to students even when they did not do work that earned a passing grade. One student told me that her school counselor discouraged her from taking my class because it was “too difficult” and “too many” students failed my classes. This student had already taken two of my classes and insisted on taking a third class from me because she believed that she was learning a lot in my classes. 

Of course, I did fail students who did not receive the minimum of a 60% in their coursework, but I gave credit for doing both homework and in-class work, that wasn’t graded (you could get an “A”  on certain parts of the course by simply completing the work and turning it in), I allowed students to rewrite their essays many times if needed in order to get a passing grade, and I worked with students to get them to pass. A student who failed either didn’t turn in a lot of work, wasn’t willing to rewrite their work, didn’t attend class sessions, or some combination of these things. A student had to work pretty hard to not get at least a “C” in my classes because I worked really hard to try to get them to learn the things they needed to know to move to the next course.

Another problem that I encountered as a part-time instructor is that I was careful to assign the required number of pages for reading and for writing as spelled out in the “course outline of record,” but many of the full-time instructors did not adhere to the requirements (I assume that many did). Of course, it would have been easier to assign and read fewer essays, but writing students learn the most by writing and receiving feedback for their writing. Students who had an “easier” instructor often referred to how much less writing they had to do with that instructor even though I knew the requirement for that class section was much higher than students were experiencing. Students mentioned the names of specific professors often, so I came to believe that they weren’t “spinning tales.” By comparison those teachers who assigned the work they were supposed to assign were seen as “hard” teachers, demanding too much of their students.

Over the years, the culture was shifting, gradually, but noticeably. I was asked by a student to not refer to her as a “young lady”–even though her appearance was as a young lady– because her goal was to become a young man. This was my first encounter with transgender issues, and it made me very sad for this young woman. However, it did not change how I treated her in class or how I graded her work. I prayed for her then and still pray for her as she comes to mind. I know that my doing so would be deeply offensive to some. She was kind to me, though, and we had a friendly conversation unlike what is often posted on social media today when someone is not referred to in the way that they desire, and I did my best not to “misgender” her again. I wasn’t trying to be offensive, but at the same time, she wasn’t trying to be offended. (Using “her” here at the period of history is deeply offensive to some, but using “him” here would be neither accurate, nor clarifying.)

I had a student become angry with me after I mentioned the “Negro College Fund” by name and so used the word “negro” in the classroom. She addressed me in private about it, though, and I explained that the name was chosen by the organization and that I was not using a descriptive word. It was the actual name of an actual organization.  She was very surprised at that, but she stopped being angry and was not aggressive also unlike what we see on social media in our current culture. I suggested as a research paper topic how we name things, how the meanings of words change over time, how our association with words change and the question of when we need to change titles to fit the changing culture.

It stands out to me now that Megan Kelley was driven out of her position at NBC for asking such a question in regards to the use of “black face” in entertainment. She wondered when it moved from being generally accepted to being tabu. It was a good question, but asking the question got her “canceled” and fired.

Nearing the end of my time at the college, we would get invitations to come to the quad and join hands in support of and solidarity with the LBGTQ community (at that time those were all of the initials being used). As a part-timer I could not be required to attend, and I never did. Why not? I treated all of my students with respect and kindness and graded all of their papers fairly, based on how well they were written, not on the opinions they held. But–I believed and still do believe that the agendas associated with the LBGTQ community are often harmful to students and not beneficial to them. And while I support all people’s right to think of themselves and present themselves however they want to, I do not agree that all choices are equal and good and the best thing for us, and I do not think I should pretend that I do agree, and I certainly should not be required to profess things that I do not think are true.

Eventually, I encountered the first of the “woke” trainings at the college. It was presented to us this way:  If we would voluntarily attend “diversity and inclusion” training, we would receive a virtual “sticker” to post on our staff web page that announced to students that our classrooms were a “safe place” for students of all colors and identities. Would that mean, then, that the classrooms of all instructors who did not attend this training and did not have this sticker were “unsafe” places for some students?  Many, like me, recognized that this idea was insulting and that it was the accusation that you are guilty until you prove otherwise. I did my best to treat all of my students fairly. I had never been accused of treating any student unfairly. Why would I need special training to have my classes declared “safe” for my students?

At the end of one of the essays that we read and discussed in my writing classes was a cultural survey about attitudes toward sex, dating, marriage, etc. I had students in my classes complete this survey anonymously for nearly 20 years. The changes in the answers over the years as well as the way the discussions shifted over time, revealed a huge cultural shift that is both alarming and terribly sad.

In the mid 90s the overwhelming majority of students believed that sex should be inside a committed relationship–that the couple should be married or at least engaged. When asked how often they had sex, most students answered “never” or “seldom,” but also believed that their peers had sex “often” or even “daily.” When I asked about this disparity in my classes, more than one student pointed to TV and movies for what they thought was “normal.” I remember one student who said, “Well, on ‘Friends’ they are all having sex with each other.”

By the time of my last semester of teaching in 2014, most students responded on the survey with approval of sex with someone you just met, “casual hook ups.” In class discussions many students said they considered marriage irrelevant and did not plan to get married or have children. They pointed to their own parents and their failed marriages as the reason behind their thinking. Students had begun celebrating their “uncommittment” to each other. True love, they argued, was expressed by staying with someone without ever having to commit to staying. Each day you stayed was a new profession of love.

I taught college classes for over 20 years, and in that time, the culture of the community college where I taught most of those years shifted and changed in so many ways, most of them not good or healthy at all. I saw a community of instructors–where adjunct and full-timers liked and supported each other, shift to an us-against-them mentality over issues of pay and resources and unions. I saw the rise of a division between faculty members based on political and religious views and race. I saw the rise of Atheism as a value among faculty members as well as the celebration of pagan religions as valued while Christianity was devalued and maligned.

I did not leave teaching because I was unhappy or worried about where these things were going; I left because my family and I felt called by God to move, to establish a church and ministry, and to begin reaching out and serving in a culture in very intentional ways that involved moving to a community that did not have a place for me to teach college English. 

But . . . I can’t help but think that God moved me at exactly the right time. I don’t know how I would have navigated all the things that have happened in the decade since I left teaching. I know that much of what has occurred has made me very sad about the state of higher education.

Lately, I have felt a little bit hopeful about the future of higher education. Perhaps spaces are opening up for conservative-leaning instructors, traditional historians, and both instructors and students of faith and conviction. Maybe education will land more firmly on the side of the free exchange of ideas and the freedom to express dissenting viewpoints. 

We wait. We watch. We pray.

Changed and Changing

Jan16

I’m not the person I once was and not the person that I will one day be. And that’s very good news. 

Today, I have lived 59 years.That’s amazing to me and somewhat unbelievable. Wasn’t I in my twenties just moments ago? In truth I’ve been planting many seeds in my life in the past 30 years (and more). As I look back at the growth in my life in the past 30 years, what does the crop look like that I am harvesting now?

I’ve learned to love better, much better. I’m more patient in difficult circumstances and with difficult people. I’ve learned how to wait well, to wait on GOD as a loving Father and to be more compassionate with hurting people. I treat people more gently and with more kindness. 

I feel peaceful most of the time, no matter what manner of chaos is going on around me. I live with deep joy.

All of these things have grown in me, not because I am someone outstanding or amazing, but because over time I have learned to surrender to the prodding of the Holy Spirit in my life, day after day after day. I have come to understand the benefit of surrendering quickly and fully to the Holy Spirit, to not try to battle it out with the GOD of the universe. I have experienced His goodness and His grace, His great kindness and tender mercy.

I have responded to the hunger and thirst for the Word that the Holy Spirit has stirred in me, and it has continued to grow more deep and vast, and my view of Scripture has grown richer and more intense. It’s been opened up to me in a way that Wendy in her twenties only dreamed of. Consequently, I have grown consistent in seeking GOD through His Word and have gradually expanded my morning time with Him, wanting so much more.

I sense GOD’s presence so very close to me all throughout the day now, every day. If I feel fearful or anxious, my first and immediate response is to go to GOD as my loving Father in prayer and worship. He is my refuge. He comforts me, leads me, and holds me. He faithfully draws out all fear and worry. In His presence is perfect peace.

I knew GOD well when I was 39. I’d had babies and cancer and healing. I knew Him even better at 49.I’d had failures and successes and walked in more confidence and less fear.

At 59 I realize that I’ve only begun to know Him. In the past decade I’ve relied even more on my heavenly Father for strength, comfort, direction, and provision. With my family I uprooted my life, resettled in another state, changed careers, started a ministry, and left behind a wonderful life for an equally wonderful, entirely different one.  I’ve lost both of my parents and have celebrated the lives they lived serving Jesus. I’ve moved into a new season where my siblings and I are now in that “older” generation.

And throughout all of these changes, I’ve continued to grow in my knowledge and understanding of GOD. And He is wonderful. I suspect that throughout Eternity I will be learning, growing, and knowing more and that there will be no end to the expanding depth and richness of understanding about who GOD is and how deeply He loves me.

I’m not done growing and changing. New challenges have revealed new places in me in need of GOD’s tender transformation, and I am confident that He will continue to refine me as I continue to cooperate with all that He wants to do in my life. 

And whatever this next year holds for me, I know that GOD will be faithful to His promises. He will never leave me (Hebrews 13:15), He will supply everything that I need (Philippians 4:19), and He will work out all things for my good (Romans 8:28).

The last birthday of my fifties. The last year before turning 60. Ready.Set.Go!

Being Changed

Jan21

© Wendy Clark, 2021

I’ve been using Bob Goff’s book Live in Grace-Walk in Love:A 365-Day Journey as a supplement to my other Bible studies, Bible reading, and personal reflection. Though Bob Goff’s book follows a schedule of sorts, I don’t read in keeping with it.  (I’m somewhere in October’s reading right now.) But as often happens when I read daily readings according to my own schedule, the reading for today relates well to what I have been thinking about.

Here are a few of the things that Bob Goff writes that stand out to me:

“ . . . when I started to think of them [dreaded airport experiences] as opportunities to give away love,my attitude changed.”

“When I think someone ought to be more loving, it’s usually me.”

“The longer I follow Jesus, the more I’m trying to see through the eyes of other people.”

“We come into contact with people every day who need to encounter love.”

“Don’t leave it to someone else to do the loving for you.”

I agree with all of these statements, and I understand them to be true, both in what I know and by what I have experienced. But I would not have been able to agree in the same way many years ago.

In a Bible study discussion the other day one question centered around our awareness of sin, what causes our awareness of sin, and how we respond when we become aware of our own sin.

I thought back to when I was 19 or 20, and in studying the book of I John, I became very convicted by my own lack of love for others, especially difficult people or people who thought very differently from me.

Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.  
I John 4:7-8, ESV

I had sung this passage many times (maybe you can sing the song and know where the claps belong), but suddenly the words leaped off the page right into my heart, and the entire book of I John took on new significance for me.  I felt an acute awareness of my inability to truly love other people, not an emotional, feeling, but the love that Paul describes in I Corinthians 13:

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
I Corinthians 13:4-7, ESV

I mourned over the incredible lack of true love in me, my intense selfishness, my general lack of concern about most other people, and my propensity to justify my own actions while criticizing the actions of others.

I came to the place where I recognized that in and of myself and my own will, I would never really love other people, especially difficult, challenging people. But that’s exactly what Jesus tells us to do.

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same?” 
Matthew 5:43-47, ESV

I needed a Savior, a Deliverer, a Redeemer, and a Teacher,  I needed transformation by a Power other than my own.

And so . . . 

I confessed my sin of being selfish and unloving, and I took my sin where it belongs and laid it at the foot of the cross.  I surrendered.

I am convinced that if we really want to be changed, the cross is the place where we must start, confessing our sin to God, laying it down, along with all of the plans and schemes and methods that we have tried in our own strength, by our own understanding, and recognizing our total inability to do anything about our sin or our weakness. Then turning in the direction of Jesus, let Him take us to the next place in our journey.

Today when I read Bob Goff’s words about love, I agreed with them, knowing them to be true, both intellectually by the Word of God, and also by my personal experience, having lived them.  I am a much more loving person today than I was nearly 40 years ago when I felt hopeless in my ability to ever truly love.  I see the world completely differently than I did back then.  I see you differently.

How did I move from a place where loving people was never much on my radar to a place where loving people is front and center and where I actually look for opportunities to love other people?

I encountered the Word of God.
I believed it.
I submitted to it by putting it into practice.
I repeated these steps over and over and over again.

If you are struggling with sin, something in you that you know is counter to God’s Word, that you know needs to change, there is a simple practice that will take you to the next step:  Encounter the Word of God.  Believe it.  Surrender to it. 

Easy?  Often it is not. It tends to take a lot of practice.

Simple?  Yes, very simple.  Even a young child can learn this practice, step by step, and it’s something that we should teach our children, even as we model it for them.

So then, do I now love perfectly? No. I am still being transformed.  I am not who I once was, but I am not yet who I will be.  

To me, that is very good news because in this last strange and challenging year, I have both made some new mistakes, and I’ve also repeated some very old ones.  I have sometimes fallen into trying to persuade people who perhaps needed more to experience unconditional love. I have sometimes trod with heavy feet where I ought to have stopped lightly. 

I am aware of these sinful missteps because I have daily encountered the Word of God.  I believe that what God says is true and non-negotiable. I confess my sin daily (and trust me, I have daily sin to confess), and I seek to align myself with what God says is true and right and good.  I surrender.

Every day that I practice, practice, practice following Jesus, I am transformed by the Power of the Holy Spirit, little by little.

If we will seek to be transformed, minute by minute, day by day, over a lifetime, we will, in time, be greatly changed. Instead, often we look for huge change in a short amount of time and with little perseverance, and so find ourselves to be ever the same.

Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit. 
2 Corinthians 3:17-18, ESV

I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.  
Romans 12:1-2, ESV

Encouragement from the Lives of Other Believers: Darlene Deibler Rose

Aug29

© Wendy Anne Clark, 2020

Hebrews 12:1-3

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.

Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted.”

Over the past couple of years I have been reading and re-reading the testimonies of Christians who experienced very difficult circumstances, yet in those times continued to walk closely with God and to live in peace and joy, ministering to the people around them.  These testimonies act as encouragement from the “great cloud of witnesses” who have gone before us.

Darlene Deibler Rose a young missionary who was taken prisoner by the Japanese during WWII is a story well worth reading if you haven’t read it before or re-reading if you need some encouragement today. 

Evidence Not Seen: A Woman’s Miraculous Faith in the Jungles of World War II

There are many both challenging and encouraging stories in this book, but one that stands out to me involves Mr. Yamaji, who ran the Kampili POW camp where Darlene was held captive.  He was a particularly cruel and unreasonable man.  One of the things they were required to do was for each prisoner to catch 100 flies every day to help reduce the fly population in the camp. He would beat those who couldn’t produce 100 dead flies.

Darlene’s young husband dies in a separate camp, and Yamaji calls her into his office to deliver the news and to ask her to not lose the joyful influence that she has over others in the camp. Darlene assures him that her hope is not in this world and then shares the gospel with him:

“[Jesus] died for you, Mr. Yamaji, and He puts love in our hearts—even for those who are our enemies. That’s why I don’t hate you, Mr. Yamaji. Maybe God brought me to this place and this time to tell you He loves you.”

He leaves her sitting in the outer office where she must wait until she is formally dismissed, and he goes into his private office where Darlene can hear that he is weeping, for some time.  Whatever happened to him in that office that day, he begins to show evidence of a changed life. One striking piece of evidence that he is not the same cruel man he once was  involves bananas.

After Darlene had been moved from Yamaji’s camp to solitary confinement in a prison where she is likely to be eventually executed, she observes a woman outside her window in the courtyard being passed bananas over the fence.  She begins to long for a single banana and asks God to send her one but doesn’t really see how that might even be possible.

“I bowed my head again and prayed, ‘Lord, there’s no one here who could get a banana to me. There’s no way for You to do it. Please don’t think I’m not thankful for the rice porridge. It’s just that–well, those bananas looked so delicious!’”

The next day, Mr. Yamaji comes to visit her in solitary confinement and then delivers to her 92 bananas, which prompts her to kneel in confession before God:

“In all my spiritual experience, I’ve never known such shame before my Lord. I pushed the bananas into a corner and wept before Him. ‘Lord, forgive me; I’m so ashamed. I couldn’t trust You enough to get even one banana for me. Just look at them–there are almost a hundred.’”

God responds back to her:

“’That’s what I delight to do, the exceeding abundant above anything you ask or think.’ I knew in those moments that nothing is impossible to my God.”

Two encouraging words through this story.  God loves us personally and knows what we need.  He is faithful to care for us and to bless us, even when we can’t see how He will do it.

Second, we can minister to others and have influence even when that seems impossible.  

After the war Mr. Yamaji was set to be executed for his war crimes, but because of the number of people who testified on his behalf, prisoners who said his manner changed and he was a great help to them, Mr. Yamaji was spared and sentenced to life in prison.  Later however, because of his good behavior in prison, he was released  from prison and went on to own a business.  Though Darlene had not had confirmation of his salvation while in prison, Mr. Yamaji shared the Gospel on the radio in the 1980s, many years later.

We don’t always know the influence that we are having at the time, but if we stay close to God and remain faithful, God can use us, even when we can’t see how.